A.V. Opinions: Willem Dafoe and Madonna made the best erotic thriller of the 1990s
Dear Future Self,
I'm writing to you from the past. I'm obsessed with a movie that I'm not supposed to be watching - "Body of Evidence.” I know, I know, it's a total guilty pleasure, but come on, it's got Madonna in it! Like a virgin my ass!
I remember the first time I saw it like it was yesterday. I was waiting for my parents to go to bed, sneaking glances at the clock every few minutes. Sometimes I'd even pretend to be sick just so I could stay home and watch it. As soon as they were out the door, I'd grab the remote and tune into Channel 99 - the blurry, static-filled channel that showed the most scandalous content in waves of satisfaction. And that's the first time I saw it - "Body of Evidence" in all its grainy, wavy, distorted glory.
Later, when I discovered Cinemax, I'd stay up late, watching it whenever I could. I was so hooked that I bought a VHS copy from the video store. I had to lie about my age, of course - I told them I was 18, and they totally believed me (I guess I was a pretty convincing liar back then). I played that tape so many times, it's a wonder it didn't wear out. I was wore out from the waste down but the VHS tape was indestructible. I'd watch it every night, rewinding and rewatching my favorite scenes over and over again. Don’t judge me!
That movie turned me into a man, Future Self. It taught me about the power of sexuality. And it also introduced me to the awesome Willem Dafoe - who would later show up in Spider-Man as the Green Goblin. I was like, "I know that guy! He's the dude Madonna hooks up with. He's from one of my favorite movies!"
I hope you realize that "Body of Evidence" was more than just a guilty pleasure - it was a rite of passage. It helped me navigate sexuality. So, Future Self, I hope you still remember those nights, sneaking around to watch a movie that was forbidden fruit. I hope you still appreciate "Body of Evidence" - even if it's just for naughty nostalgic reasons. In my opinion, "Body of Evidence" is the best erotic thriller of the 1990s. I hope you still fill the same.
-Past McBoom